i broke down. all of a sudden. with a cause. because if something i would not wish to disclose. i broke down so badly. so so badly. i cried my eyes out. its only 10pm. its just so wrong. i punched the wall. it helped a bit. im so tempted to take the knife and slit my wrist. i know its just a silly breakup. but thats one thing i cant handle.

i had my blood donated today. so i have a hole in my veins. why dont i just juse the knife and dig the veins out. sigh.

i dont have a purpose here. i really dont. sigh.

i dont want to live anymore. i fucking hate this feeling. its like im back in square one again. only this time i've lived with the fact that shes with someone else. what i cant live with is that ... sigh.

i hate this. im fucking drowning my sorrows in tears. i finally know how it feels like breaking down all of a sudden. it sucks. trust me. it really does. dont break down. just dont. this would most probably be my last post if i slit myself. bye bye world. bye bye life. bye bye friends. bye bye family.

rick.